Aktualisiert: 16. Sept 2019
I am sure that if you asked any parent what they want most for their children, their answer would be: "Happiness!" But at the same time, most parents want their children to be well behaved, skilled, achieving, successful, beautiful, liked, secure, safe and sound, and so much more.
It seems to me, that we as a society have forgotten that our happiness doesn't necessarily lie in our achievments, in things, in the way we look or in any other outside circumstance.
Wanting your children to be happy, and then expecting that happiness to look a certain way, might be a contradiction in itself, since those expectations are based on our own opinions and attitudes, and oftentimes not on the real needs and heart's desires of the ones we are putting them upon.
As I've come to understand and learn more about happiness, I've realized that it has a lot more to do with our ability to live authentically and in alignement with our souls and hearts, than with being successful, popular or materially well-off.
Thus, there are plenty of people that are able to find true happiness in seemingly dreadful situations.
Everything in our material world is fleeting in nature, so happiness that depends on it exclusively, can and will not last, and will eventually start to crumble or feel shallow and futile.
Mostly, our path to happiness isn't a straight one, and at some point we are most likely going to be presented with great challenges, disappointmens, setbacks and losses. That's why avoiding risks, pain, criticism and possible failure keeps us ofentimes (unconsciously) stuck in fear rather than helps us move closer towards true happiness.
We want our children to do well and to succeed in life, but for many, the pressure of having to measure up to the high and complex standards of our modern society is a weight that is extremely hard to carry.
So we keep, unintentionally, leading our offspring away from the happy lives we intend for them to live, into fear, anxiety and depression.
If you take time to listen to young children closely and with an open heart, their message is clear: "Happiness is simple. It is right here, right now, and it is always within me! If I might get upset at some point, don't worry! It'll only take a short amount of time until you see me back on my happy track again!"
Children are wired to live, love and enjoy life to its fullest.
Children don't need a reason for happiness, they are naturally happy.
And so are we.
Somewhere along the way we just might have forgotten about it...
What if the time is now ripe to admit that we as adults will never be fully able to know what's best for our children, and what their journey on the path of happiness (not towards, since they are normally aligned with happiness already) is supposed to like? We can now learn to pay tribute to their wisdom and ability to live truly happily, and hand the power over their lives back to them!
I know that every child is born with a unique and marvellous roadmap for the journey through life, safely stored in its soul. No two maps are identic, no two journeys the same, and only the holder of the map has the ability to view it clearly and to see which path needs to be taken at which turn.
Following the path highlighted by one's heart means to stay connected to that original state of happiness, even if it might get clouded at times, to travel through life with a sense of fulfillment and purpose, and to have the capacity to access the strength and courage that are needed to overcome obstacles that might turn up along the way.
I dare to say, that children oftentimes know and remember a lot more about happiness than we do. Let them show us the way out of our heads back into our hearts, out of fear back into trust, and let them teach us that we don't have to earn or deserve happiness.
In fact, we are happiness.
"When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life.
When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.
I wrote down "happy".
They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn't understand life."
- John Lennon -